Welsh

nt: Living Room

A young man is talking to his parents

Son: Come on mum, sit down. I've got something to tell you.

Mum: But why not have a cup of tea first?

Son: Mum, please, just sit down. This is important.

Dad: What is it son?

Son: (on the verge of tears) Dad (beat) Mum. I think I'm Welsh.

Mum: Oh Darl..

Dad: You think or you know?

Son: (beat) I know

Dad: Since when?

Son: Since always I think. I believe I was born Welsh.

Dad: You were born in Bracknell. Unless... (turning to Mum accusingly)

Mum: (To Dad) Don't be silly dear. I'd never go with a Welshman. (Turning to son) No offence son. (Beat)
It's because I listened to Men of Harlech when you were a baby isn't it? And those trips to Aberystwyth when you were small?

Son: Don't blame yourself Mum. There's nothing to be blamed for. I'm fine!

Mum: I knew it all along you know. All that time spent moping around as a teenager.

Son: Yes! It was really my national dourness and pessimism!

Mum: It explains so much

Son: Anyway, I'd best away. Me and some of the lads are going to speak Welsh around some english people for no other reason than to make them feel uncomfortable..(beat) Ah, I feel so much better.

Dad: Now, we've got that out of the way might you be settling down with a nice girlfriend any time soon?

Son: Oh that? I like cock Dad, didn't you know? Anyway, Hwyl!